Jack sat across the table crunching on chips and salsa, while we sat at El Torrito’s waiting for our dinner to come out. (Thanks for the gift card Grandma Virginia!) I was excitedly telling him all that I was learning from my photography magazine. His face then got serious and then the words that I had been avoiding were flowing out of his mouth! “So now that you’re really serious about photography, what’s going to happen with your cakes? Are you going to still do them, or are you done?” The question seemed so final! I am serious about photography; I now have a clear vision of where I want to be at the end of the year. Doing engagements & weddings. I really want to focus on that and in order for me to get to that goal I need to turn down other kinds of shoots. This year is my year of second shooting. Hopefully it doesn’t take me a full year to finally book my first wedding, but if so then so be it! But I’m not sure if I NEVER want to do cakes again. I always have a backup plan, and for now cake is my backup plan.
When I explained this to Jack, he told me something I’ll never forget, “Stop having an Escape route, you need to go all in and MAKE IT WORK!” Was my backup plan, my escape route? Yes, it was. I am afraid of failing so when the road gets tough, I quit and go to my backup plan. Or Escape Route. The only thing I have ever fully committed myself to, with no backup plan, is our marriage. Other than the obvious like being a good mother, but to me there is no other option!
So now I am faced with fully committing myself to my photography–which
makes sense because if I won’t commit, then who will invest in someone who isn’t
all in. This meant getting rid of my cake gear –because it is taking up the
whole loft and we need to make room. This is stuff that I have been collecting
for the past 3 years, and although I don’t use it as much anymore, I still am
passionate about it. I have problems getting rid of things that have sentimental
value to me. I even save my brothers and sisters old toys for them, because one day they will be glad to see it. Even though that day is yet to come lol! I guess I thought that I’d just store all the stuff in the garage until we moved into a house, then I would have room for each of my hobbies –haha nice try Janelle!
I think I will compromise and get rid of most of my items, but keep some things JUST IN CASE I need to make a cake for my family. Photography is going to be like my husband and Cake will be my Sancho. Haha! Totally joking! Definitely don’t believe in Sanchos! Im leaving you with a saying that I heard, “There is no Success without Failure.”
Xx, Janelle Marina